Funny stories
In General I suggest to write here the story of the very stupid thing you did as a bunch,stoned,both(underline)So I remember when swells bought champagne and I thought that it would run quickly up the stairs into parade to run...well, you perdstavlyaet this picture, the crowd buhih runs up the stairs screaming and champagne over my head:)))) in General it should be seen:)
I'm walking down the street and see the person is 30-40 years not less than fit and he sprashivaet :
where does the Uzbek-lunch !!!
PS this Uzbek was very drunk and was carrying him over a mile ))))
When I was in first grade was raced on the student, in short I went vles to the river, going to watch the puddle and the side of the small path I think will bust or not, went right on the bump through the steering wheel flew then when I went back to the same bump again flew. Although after more never not flown
My friend asked me to find in the Internet the song, saying he liked me as a PPC. He wrote its name from the radio on a piece of paper - Unknow Artist - Untitled Track.
When Gresham it showed us was hysterical)))
LOL!!!!
And here is my case:
-1 year ago,on the course,I decided to pin.The lesson every minute quickly,quietly shouting-What's that smell?!
This continued for 1 pair.Then he broke down-Well that stinks what stinks?I'm crap!We then all week his daughter teasing-why it stinks..)))
Overlord certainly fun what you have achieved but izdavaca for it over the woman, of course rude,often give yourself in someone else's place
And on the subject Nitsche can not say like Neche don't remember when booze and weed once smoked because now I'm afraid))) iza that happened to me
Was once I'm home from uni, met a very hungry man (do not give the wife apparently). He can say he wanted me, it just struck my figure, my makeup, well, invited to go to a cafe. There he offered a drink, lunch, began to spin my sex. I only had eyes for him, buying time. During that time I got drunk, ate his fill, HE paid and we went for a walk. I went to the entrance, he began to squeeze me, offered to do this right there. I some how loosened, saying about certain days that are girls. He got a little upset asked for my number. I gave him the room, painted front +7921 and the first 7 characters of Asya suites, and she went home. When he got home I just broke out in laughter.
The story told to me by my partner. He was born and long lived in Georgia. Somehow he was not at home, but attended his grandfather. But it should be noted that Irakli and his grandfather's voices are very similar. The phone rings, my friend Irakli - Den. The grandfather picks up the phone: - Hello. - Hey, chuvyrla! (10-second pause, easy stage efigenia) - Well, Hello, ugly... what's up? Yeah OK.. been here? - Yes, half an hour ago (the grandfather went to the store). - Thump go? (Muse) - Come on. - You got money? - SchA will look... Grandfather earnestly goes to check on the availability of money. Well, there are 50 lari (Georgian currency). - Excellent! SchA I'll come. - Come on. - Parents not at home? (fucking returns, the so-called ancestors died 10 years before). - No. - Not coming? - No, just will not come. - A grandfather like you the house was... no, he died! (starts fucking on the other side) - How he died? - Oh! - So I Sedna saw? - Yes, I have it in 43-m died!!! (the apotheosis, a 30-second pause) - Eeee... AAA... AAA Irakli possible?
I PATSTALOM!!!LOL!!!
Who thought it was my watch in the beginning of all these homeless people pesusich under the bridge !
I remember when I was little I had a funny case.It was winter. In General, we were walking with my friend and decided to go on the slide.Rode,rode, and suddenly we see a dog which dreams played.And of course we started to run.And then turned around and the dog had disappeared,well, we started skating again.And when I rolled down a hill,just at this moment runs a dog this happy,cheerful.And direct I was running.My friend shouts run.And I ran as hard and laughed(it is no matter how serious it was).Ran I ran and I proposal past the clothesline where clothes are dried.I ran my forehead straight into the rope and such flip did that whole matrix would be.I lie in the snow and see that my hat flew from his head, and just the dog near me.See dog took my hat in his teeth and how he runs from me.I have not found his hat,as if she vanished.Probably the dog is buried somewhere hat or the landlord brought.That's the story.
PS I have a dog, you see, and the business can open.
I drugan told the story of how he once rode in the bus: there sat two old soldiers, one really fought and the second looks like not, history is silent as they say. So here is another one that rubs it in 45том Japs on Sakhalin drove and stuff and breaks into another where were you, where was I you ask??? the other sits and can't give a clear answer, so when the one who really fought it was necessary to leave him standing at the door leans to the other and says I know where you've been in PI*you were here!!!
We are in the Park today with a friend and his girl were walking,saw the announcement of the sale of the kittens will Give a kitten in good hands,run 3 months,fully Staffed! Have fur,whiskers,paws. Growling built in.Feature emptying(latacc).Can lie on the TV,dangling a tail on the screen.Has an unquenchable joie de vivre! The power function is debugged (has everything),glitches are not present! Upgrades himself,mice identifies and destroys.When we read the five minute lay in the snow shaking from laughing still my stomach aches.
when I was 6,in the evening the parents brought a bottle.I thought this brew on tap,drank,drank two glasses he drank and realized that this is not the brew!It was a light beer on tap!and then came the parents and.. didn't notice that I staggered went to sleep!!In!And you weak?!?(I have this joke for 9 years remember and can't forget)
History from the 3rd grade!(still laughing):
We have shorter periodicals and went to physical education....I dressed!But for a long time....(fiddling with laces.)Well, a friend of mine also got changed and I don't know who ran out of the classroom.(because everyone already left.)And by the way!We had a leaky ceiling.Well, the teacher put the bucket so they all poured,the bucket filled with water..........Well, when the bucket Buli full I ran as I do not know who,and a jump jumped into the bucket of water!I purely did not notice!Well, all I bellow!(good thing the teacher didn't notice!)I do not know who ran drying!But in gym class I was late.....The next day I do not know who were laughing at yourself!As I was there in bucket jumped...
Well, in short: a geography lesson, one teacher, one Nikitos.
The class isn't quite adequate. I mean prikolotnjansky. While the teachers go from class to the office begins the shoutbox. Who Gish and chopped, who reads, who is talking, and someone is on duty at the door. So. Niketas this time for some dick vyper to walk around the school. And at this time in the class sakoda Gennady. Everyone is silent. Decides who will go to the Board. And then... In the class runs chicken. Not noticing the geographer turned to the class and began to tell about how he met there Gorelkina... and so on. The whole class rzhot! This is fucking not understand and rzhot with everyone. Finally turned on the right and... And Gennady sits quietly and looks at him.
Hmm... Klaas fell over from his chair. Was still day one. Now nekit just goes with the lesson. That's all.
Pre-trial resolution of disputes (in every joke there is some joke).
During a trip to the region was faced with a very curious incident. It turned out that nowhere in our Russian law does not say that the documents should be produced on paper and not on any other materials. Here and laughed the whole city over a certain conflict with the Bank. What they do not share, I personally do not listen. Talking about some unfair Commission payments on a fee for account maintenance... But it's fine and legal matter. Significantly, it is known that.
When the entrepreneur (further - P) referred for resolution to the Bank , spiteful Bank employees said: Write the claim, we will have 60 days to consider and then still refuse. P removed from office, leaving a farewell: volunteered. The bankers did not realize that P is a monopolist in the supply of cut stone for the monuments, foundations and others. Here P and put the Bank required a claim. A quiet Sunday evening on a heavy truck, the claim was driven around the city. Near the locked office of the Bank's claim was carefully unloaded two heavy cranes and installed on the porch. And in the morning it turned out that the claim is somewhat hampered the Bank's staff to get to the office. Actually, the claim was very modest. Strict slab of gray granite, weighing some 12 tons. At the plate throughout the form was knocked claim to the Bank. With all the details, including the address P for the response.
Of course, the Bank does not have it so. The remaining office employees of the Bank called the police. Having carefully considered the claim, the police explained that there is no crime, but there is a civil legal relations. Then advise the Bank to solve the issue of P in the court of General jurisdiction and went home. But claims remain. The Bank tried to remove the claim. Unfortunately, P was the only one happy owner of multiaxial trailer and related equipment. And without a trailer to remove the claim was not possible. Bankers caused the tractor and gathered to catch a claim rope and push at least from the porch to the street. Handling complaints stopped the way passing the police, explaining that clutter the roadway claims impossible. Poor Bank employees had to enter the workplace through the Windows. Bank customers politely refused and preferred to go to other banks.
The next day, the judge of the district court, after hearing the complaint of the Bank, refused to order an interim measure to require P to cancel the claim. Moreover, it was found that the Bank has no right to deny the claim based on the use of paperless materials, and should be moved to the archive and to consider, in accordance with their own procedures. As a result, on the third day, the Bank hired a team of workers with jackhammers still shattered transported to claim sizes. And on the same day, P called the Bank and politely asked the outcome of a claim. Hearing the promise P in the case of procrastination put a new claim, already on three pages, the Bank chose not to bring this up and immediately canceled P all commissions. So the pre - trial settlement is a very effective measure!